At the check-out line of a local Food Lion supermarket, a senior citizen with a large bag of Purina dog chow in his shopping cart was asked by the woman standing next to him if he had a dog.
What was the woman thinking? Did she think he had an elephant?
To the question, the retired fellow replied, 'No, I don't have a dog. I am starting the Purina Diet again. I probably shouldn't because the last time I did it, I ended up in the hospital, and I awakened in the Intensive Care Unit with tubes coming out of practically every hole in my body and IVs in both arms. But I had lost 50 lbs."
The oldster then continued to say that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it worked was to load his pockets with Purina Nuggets and simply eat one or two every time he felt hungry; the food was nutritionally complete so it worked well and he was going to try it again.
It should be mentioned here that practically everyone in check-out line was now enthralled with the old man's story.
Horrified, she asked if the guy ended up in Intensive Care because the dog food poisoned him.
He told her, "No, I stopped to pee on a fire hydrant when a car hit me."
The guy standing behind the woman looked like he was going to have a heart attack at the way he was laughing so hard.
Food Lion informed the old man not to shop in that store anymore!
Better watch what you ask some retired people. They have all the time in the world to think of crazy things to say. –Author Unknown
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